Photo 1: One fine evening, which ends this summer, I can not remember exactly when, there was this little family of loons who lived very friendly shores of the islands not far from us. Little has really grown since ...
Photo 2: The same evening, in the setting sun was painting them gold, Dad and Mom Huard Huard had had little sleep, I guess?
color feelings
We talked it again this morning, Crocodile Dundee and me since our lunches will still probably one of our best times of the day before we were invaded by the life that goes too fast and responsibilities that are engulfing us. We grew up in this town, we went to school together throughout our school, we worked around, we got involved, we love the world, and therefore, we spend our time to be sad for One, to help the other to be affected, asked, shaken or challenged to understand and act in all sorts of situations. That's life. Finally, it is ours.
Among those people who live around us difficult things, I think these two couples whose wife, in her early fifties, suffers from Alzheimer's disease. This is one of two that I want to talk, A and J which are part of our family. I was diagnosed three years ago, when she was barely 50 years old, she has now 53 and his disease degenerates quickly, dramatically.
his spouse, do not ever let, he is careful, he will leave his health and perhaps even his life, as we know, he told us, he proves it every day and we can not do anything about it. Except be there, sometimes, when the opportunity presents itself, he needs us to offer our friendship, our tacit complicity, our benevolent and understanding, our humor, we must not neglect this aspect in what he saw.
Yet it should not be so difficult ...
J was known when she was part of his life to him, it's been. In our dinners with friends, our meetings Random races in our city, our trips, team sports, and everywhere, A and J were a funny couple with whom we had fun talking, laughing and discuss all topics. It often happened that J is found in the same circle as me, I felt she loved me well and it was mutual.
past three years since this terrible disease has taken a lot of space in their lives, people have become more scarce around them, they are not invited as before, they were leaking, I I saw the insidious phenomena occur very often in my eyes, I saw our mutual friends and I was disappointed with their attitude. In it is already open to me, he suffers greatly, he feels cut off from the world, he who would need so much as a cool breeze in the heat wave that will never end.
I can not do anything for which I recognize me, who do most of my laughs and gestures with which I can not make contact in any way, even non-verbal. She is gone, this was funny to me that J and sought my company, who came and sat with me quite naturally, after giving me a kiss. At the beginning of her illness, she still smiled, as if I reminded him something nice. But now, in his very aggressive phase of the disease, I probably represents a threat to her, at least, something very unpleasant and disturbing. It became difficult for me to work with.
The other night we went to the movies together, three couples, including A and J. As always, we had an appointment at the terrace cafe-bar in front of one hour before, just to have a drink before the start of the film we wanted to see. It is the only type of output that A and J can afford to do with the friends we are and who have not yet deserted. I became extremely aggressive and contempt toward A but he seems resigned to that is his daily lot, and he does nothing, except when it hits him, he takes her wrists to stop him and talk gently to it constantly. It has gotten there.
That evening, I sat next to her, we came off worst and there is always an empty seat next to her, you understand why. I ordered my lemon Perrier, I lit a cigarette (it was outside on the terrace anyway !...) and saw in his expression that it bothered her. I turned off right away and put my cigarette the ashtray under the table on the sidewalk. Subsequently, she did not let go of all time, calling me every name, ordering me to sit on the floor, it was my place, I threw scornful looks, muttering insults profusely, saying the stronger at other times, some silly, it's not his fault and I understand, but some hurt me very much.
I do not want to J, not two seconds, she is more herself, the disease is at work. The question is not here. But spend an hour sitting next to someone you hate, despise you, and made orally bluntly, I found it painful and I did not know what to do, I could not react. There was a great discomfort to our table and around, because nobody dared to react either. At one point, she took his bowl of cafe mocha almost empty in his hands, staring at me with all his rage, I thought she was going to launch it. I woke up, I said it's time we cross the movies before having to queue ...
I was beautiful then I remember the moments I lived with in the past, our lively discussion of the time she liked me we had fun and laughter that once rang out when we were together, undergo a similar rejection from him today in a public place or even in private, is beyond my strength, I confess frankly.
I'm not proud of myself, I begin to understand all those and all those who have strayed from the pair A and J in the last three years. I'll never let fall is always a friend for whom I have feelings colorful friendship, affection, compassion and empathy, but I do not force me to suffer more from such rejection J, too affected by this terrible disease.
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